3 Things I Learned From My First Solo Trip

“Tapping into this level of presence and connection with myself and my needs was new to me”

Have you ever considered solo travel but not sure if it’s for you?

Maybe you’re still worried about if you’ll feel awkward or lonely on your own?

Or maybe you’re worried about safety travelling alone?

Maybe you’re secretly admiring your friend’s amazing solo travel pics on Insta and wish you felt ready to take the plunge?

Well, then this post is for you!

I think that solo travel is one of the most freeing and liberating experiences that I’ve had and by the end of this post I hope I to convince you to try it at least once. I’m not going to get into the technicalities and logistics of solo travel, there are plenty of really talented travel bloggers that will do the topic more justice than me, here is a great post from one of my favourite travel bloggers.

What I am going to share are my experiences on the personal growth side of solo travel and how I was able to tap into more of myself by travelling alone.

My first solo trip

About this time last year, I was getting ready for my first solo trip ever. I took inspiration from my vision board and set my sails on the Lysefjord in Norway. Ever since I saw an image of the Pulpit Rock I knew that I just had to visit this beautiful summit that looked like the beautiful scenery from Lord of The Rings! Just completely breathtaking and awe-inspiring.

I decided to go on this trip quite spontaneously. I had intentionally not made any other plans, I was holding out to be inspired to do something different. So I booked this trip just a few weeks out and went. It felt right on all levels and combined all the things I was looking for to ring in my solar return; nature, hiking and a new experience.

The recovering people pleaser in me was so done with organising, coordinating and ultimately taking responsibility for gathering loved ones and making sure that they have a good time on my birthday. Over-functioning is a big pattern of mine that I’m still working on unpacking (journeying in grace). This time I decided to focus on myself first and explore what I truly wanted vs what I thought I should be doing to celebrate my birthday.

Turns out that I enjoy solo time in nature much more than “going out” in the way that I’ve celebrated in the past, that was good then, this is what I needed now.

I learned that it’s important to honour my true deepest wishes and desires, to be in tune with myself, to not be afraid to do things differently and most of all to take space and be self-ish, to take care of my own needs first.

We often get stuck in playing roles and playing into peoples or societal expectations of how we should do life. Don’t forget to carve out space for yourself and that you don’t have to follow that formula. You can create your own path. Odds are that you’ll feel great when you start following your own spontaneity and create from the present moment vs programming of how things should be.

Me at the top of the summit, Pulpit Rock, Norway

Solo Travel vs Business Travel

Being a seasoned business traveller for the past 10 years, flying across the world for work, I had convinced myself that I had nailed the art of travelling alone and that solo travel probably wouldn’t be much different.

I was totally fooling myself! With business travel, there was always a team, client or colleague that I would meet up with at some point, so I was never truly alone for the whole trip.

Travelling solo was different, I was alone from the moment I’m jumped in the cab to the airport until I returned home. I had all my meals alone (at restaurants), I hiked up the mountain alone while everyone around me we’re in groups and I was so surprised about how much I enjoyed it.

The worries about awkward moments we’re just figments of my (poor) imagination. Things become awkward if you let them, it all depends on the type of energy that you allow and push into different things that you want to do.

Moments of Bliss

I settled into the experience quickly and just noticed that I was calm and present throughout the trip. I made a point to not speak on the phone during that long weekend, to not use that as a crutch. As soon as I landed in Stavanger I realised that I didn’t even want to talk on the phone, I wanted to be there fully, to take in the fresh mountain air, the vibe and just feel aligned.

Being alone allowed me to be here and now, to be intentional, to notice. It allowed me to follow my own spontaneity without having to worry about other peoples needs and wants. For a life long people pleaser like myself, it was a really liberating and necessary experience.

I spent that long weekend with a moment to moment presence and just kept feeling into what I wanted and let that guide me; long walks, people watching, ice cream, Mexican food, Korean face masks, painting my nails, I had a ball!

Tapping into this level of presence and connection with myself and my needs was new to me. It felt deep gratitude for being where I was, for being able to do what I was, it felt blissful and indulgent.

3 Things I Learned

So what did I learn from this trip beyond the fact that Solo Travel is now my jam ?

1. I’m A LOT more Introverted than I thought and I realised that I really like my own company.

It made me question how I have been showing up in my entire life, as an extrovert and at what cost. Being extroverted means that you use up a lot of energy to be in around people, sometimes in social settings that aren’t inspiring you or serving you anymore.

For me I realised that me showing up as an extrovert was actually connected to my people pleasing. I showed up as an extrovert because that’s what I thought I was supposed to do. This trip made me realise that I don’t need show up as an extrovert, that I love my own company, I enjoy solitude and that I’m probably more of an ambivert.

My love for people remains, its a driving force for me, always has been. But I now realise that if I spend too much time around people I can also get drained easily. Most importantly I realise that managing my energy through giving myself alone time is key to my wellbeing.

2. Being in Solitude and being alone are two different things that we often confuse.

I was alone during this trip but I didn’t feel alone. I was in a state of solitude, I intentionally created time and space to be with myself on this trip and that feel SO empowering.

I was practicing being my own best friend, for me no part of that experience made me feel alone. I was focused on the fact that I was enjoying my own company so much.

I felt aligned, calm, in harmony with myself and with my environment. I felt connected to my surroundings, to my spirituality, to the here and now.

Solitude is a positive state for me, an opportunity to practice to be in a better relationship with myself, after this trip I’ll be careful of using the words alone or lonely as freely as I have in the past.

3. Travelling alone made me more Mindful and present.

I wasn’t busy mirroring and following my travel partners thoughts and needs, it allowed me to be focused on my own experience.

This made me more mindful, I was breathing slower, noticing more in my surrounding and just able to take in more of the experience.

We have so many distractions these days coming at us from so many directions, our phones, email, the news. But, the truth is that people can be very distracting too and take up a lot of space which can sometimes take us away from our own home frequency.

Travelling alone brought me back to my home frequency, it brought me back to a mindful space where I was in harmony with myself.

Conclusion

I think that travelling alone is such a great way to practice solitude, to practice being in relationship with ourselves, to practice being our own best friend.

It gives you space and time to discover your own self reliance and creates more mind and heart space for you to reflect, think and just be.

Travelling solo can be an opportunity for personal growth if you surrender to the experience and just allow yourself to be in the moment on your solo adventure. Its also a great way to build confidence and self reliance.

I hope you’ll consider a solo trip when we can travel again, maybe start with a small staycation adventure somewhere nearby and ease into it. It’ll be time well invested, I promise.

Do you travel solo or are you thinking about trying it? Drop your comments below. I’d love to hear from you.

Ruthie